Not long ago Pennsylvania prison guards invented a new union, one suited to their peculiar personalities. Officially it's the Pennsylvania State Corrections Officers Accociation, pompous and self-important, right? It's more commonly called Amalgamated Whiners and Roughens. It's an almost embarrassingly sissified gaggle of timid, whimpering old maids! Little knots of these fellows have been going around to the various prisons (Pennsylvania now has 27 of them, do you believe? twice as many as state colleges) to picket and carp. They want even less work. The union mostly wants a bigger membership (therefore bigger dues) and that means more guards employed in each of the prisons. Never in the history of the Pennsylvania prison system has there been such a high guard to prisoner ratio. The staff is already falling over itself to collect plump state paychecks. It's time to close half the prisons and convert the guards into parole agents. We'd save a bundle!