Next there's the amusing tale of horny Pennsylvania State "Trooper" Michael K. Evans. State "Trooper" Mike has been charged with 19 counts of nastiness with teenage girls. We don't know how many little girls "Trooper" Mike molested, but three of them are accusing him of a long list of kinky sexual crimes. First there are the two runaways aged 14 and 16. These girls say that the good state cop was a wizard at jacking off. They allege that while in uniform, "Trooper" Mike liked to get them alone, whip out his unruly "Little-Jimmy," fondle the girl's most delectable delicacies and vigorously polish his wood. Another girl, this one 15, said that the cop came to her home to investigate a crime, but investigated her instead. All the girls say that he offered them money for sex. Michael K. Evans is a state cop, so not much will really happen to him. As all state cops know, the citizens, especially the female citizens, exist to serve the cops. So, mothers, the next time that a "trooper" pulls you over, you better hide your daughters. That may not be a black jack in his hand!