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In a secret laboratory in the tangled bowels of the Department
of Corrections Training Academy mad scientists have improved on
the Frankenstein monster.
Insane prison administrators (are there
any other kind?) are curing their manpower problems.
No decent
person wants to be employed as a prison guard (would you?).
Almost
all the defective personalities have already been hired into the
bloated guard force.
How were the mad managers going to get more
drones to stalk the prisons being very important?
Between boilermakers the boss had a brain-drizzle (he's long past brainstormes); clones! A few blood samples from the defects employed at the Frackville prison gave the Draculas at Department of Corrections (aptly called "DOC") their start to manufacture the ideal prison guard: a lazy bully with the IQ of a tadpole and the personality of Hitler's flatus. They isolated two sprigs of DNA for cloning. The more surly are the Buffy-Bunch, rat-faced, bald-headed, soldier-want-a-bees. They are harder to clone than the second litter because they aren't nearly as stupid, but even more cowardly. They are mostly unhappy, moody and abasing. The second batch of clown-clones are the Idiot-Irish. Most Irish are great folks, but one pathetic tribe, the Idiot-Irish, (who may really come from any place) are square-faced drunken thugs: oversized, obsessed with sex and porn, violent and loud. Some authorities call them butt-bullies because they like to beat their wives. Of course, all of this is fiction, but if you look around the prisons, you'll quickly see how much the guards now have started to look alike. It's as if there were two breeds of gerbils overrunning the DOC cages. Most prison guards have personality problems, poor egos and a sense of inferiority which they must assuage. They need to feel like they fit in. I suppose that that's why they mimic one another. But a glance at roll call gives the impression that it's a family reunion; Ozark inbreeding (my brother's my son's cousin's grandfather). "Mankind must put an end to war or You are welcome to use or republish
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