The Crazy Cake Caper
By: Roberta Price
Hershey, Pennsylvania is not one of the places where the
United States Constitution applies. A local cop who's assumed
the title of "lieutenant" has asserted that free expression can't
exist in Hershey, America's chocolate center. Free expression
is harassment, and that's a crime.
A clever woman, Angela Prince, worked for a contractor in the sprawling Milton S. Hershey Medical Center operated by Penn State University. The medical center has a reputation for being a horrid place to work, polluted with conflict, animosity and hostility. It's located a short distance outside Harrisburg, "the Unfriendly City," capital of Pennsylvania. The unfriendliness has carried over. Apparently Mrs. Prince got into a tiff with her boss, Michelle Reed. Being more creative and more self-respecting than the average drudge, Mrs. Prince expressed her indignation with a cake. You'd think a cake was harmless and legal. That doesn't account for the fact that this is Hershey, a police state where there are no Constitutional rights. Mrs. Prince decorated her cake to the effect that There's No Cure for Stupid, a truism few can dispute. She had the cake with its free expression delivered to her antagonist, and former boss, Michelle Reed. Apparently Ms Reed was a tad thin-skinned. She could argue with an employee, she could fire and employee, but she couldn't tolerate freedom of expression. Very important persons can't be criticized, not even if they're stupid. This is about where the cop, a dandy Irishman, Patrick O'Rourke, makes his dubious appearance. Some fool in Derry Township made the mistake of employing the Irishman. We've long been of the opinion that the Irish and all the other undesirable aliens should be deported. For those fortunate enough to be unfamiliar with Hershey, Derry Township is its official political designation. It's an extremist, far right-wing area of intolerance and oppression. The politics alone argue against buying anything that's marked "Hershey." Since there are no Constitutional rights in Hershey, Pat O'Rourke's storm Troopers charged the clever protester with harassment. She expressed herself. That kind of stuff isn't allowed in Hershey. The police must pre-approve all opinions. "Lieutenant" O'Rourke (as he calls himself) reportedly explained that the cops were being nice. They could have made it even worse for the outspoken citizen. There is no right of freedom of expression in Hershey. She should have known that. We don't know any of the principles in this little caper. The cop's a cop, so we know what that means. We know that Mrs. Prince is ingenious and deserving of Constitutional protections even from the likes of O'Rourke's police department excesses. As far as Ms Reed is concerned, we can say little except, maybe she needs to get over herself. Is she really so important that she can't be criticized? More to the point, does the Medical Center really want such a contractor?
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